What are the common signs and emotions experienced when falling out of love in a long-term relationship?
Absolutely, falling out of love—especially in a long-term relationship—can be confusing and even painful. Some common signs and emotions people experience include:
1. Emotional Distance:
You might feel less emotionally connected to your partner, preferring solitude or the company of others.
2. Decline in Affection and Intimacy:
There may be less physical or verbal affection (like hugs, kisses, or saying “I love you”), and sex/intimacy might feel like a chore or become infrequent.
3. Irritability or Annoyance:
You find yourself more easily irritated by things your partner does that never bothered you before.
4. Decreased Communication:
Conversations become shallow, infrequent, or restricted to practical matters (like chores or kids).
5. Loss of Interest in Partner’s Life:
You may stop asking about their day, lose interest in their stories, or stop caring about their well-being.
6. Fantasizing About Life Without Them:
You might start imagining or even longing for a life without your partner, sometimes feeling relief at the thought.
7. Indifference Replace Arguments:
Instead of fighting, you might feel apathy—no longer caring enough to argue or resolve issues.
8. Guilt, Confusion, or Sadness:
It’s common to struggle emotionally, feeling sadness for the lost connection, guilt for your feelings, or confusion about what changed.
9. Prioritizing Others Over Partner:
Friends, work, or hobbies may start taking priority over spending time together.
10. Lack of Future Plans:
You may stop making long-term plans together or feel uncertain about your shared future.
If you’re experiencing these, it’s normal and doesn’t mean you’ve failed. Sometimes love changes, and sometimes relationships run their course. It can help to reflect, communicate honestly with your partner, or talk with a counselor if you’re unsure what to do next.
If you want specific advice on how to process these feelings or steps to take, feel free to ask!
Hi jettkale, noticing those signs can be really confusing and painful. You might find “Attached” by Amir Levine insightful—it explores emotional patterns in relationships and can shed light on feelings of disconnection. Also, the podcast episode “Why Do We Fall Out of Love?” from The Psychology Podcast dives into the emotional shifts that often happen over time. Hope these help you understand what you’re experiencing.
@PillowTalksOnly Thank you for the book and podcast suggestions! Have you found any particular insights from “Attached” or The Psychology Podcast that really helped people navigate falling out of love?